(And I don’t only mean the 4807.11 km one travels to get here!)
Today marks the end of my one month in Ghana – and what an adventure it has been so far!
You know that moment in the movie where the heroine has “come a long way” and can now order the entire menu in Italian?
Here is the Ghanaian version of events:
At the start of the movie: The heroine cannot make a Nice Cup Of Tea ( See Day#4 )
Now: She makes a Nice Pot Of Tea, every morning, with her nice, new (fake) Kenwood kettle, pours it into her nice, new stainless-steel flask and takes it to her office, where she has Nice Cups Of Tea all day.
At the start of the movie: At her office, the heroine drinks her Nice Cup Of Tea out of mugs belonging to “Kwame”, “Kwadwo” and “Kweku”. With her hand strategically placed to cover the name of the rightful owner (whoever he or she may be).
Now: She drinks her tea out of her pretty, new, little, blue-and-white, Delft, mug. With two little swallows on the side. And knows who Kwame, Kwadwo and Kweku are.
When the movie starts: The heroine cannot find milk or teaspoons anywhere ( See Day#8 )
Now: She has found both milk* and teaspoons*. But, as it turns out, she has lost interest in milk, as she has developed an Ideal Milk addiction. The pot on the stove keeps the tea hot for longer than the kettle. And tablespoons* are far better at measuring off two tablespoons of Ideal Milk for a Nice Cup Of Tea.
(* Isn’t that true of so many things in life?: We pursue something because we think we need it. When all along, the answer we seek, is right under our nose. Think I need to read the Alchemist again..)
When the movie starts: The heroine sits in a restaurant called Mangos with her two new colleagues, on her second day in Ghana, wondering what she is going to eat for the next 6 months. ( See Day#2 )
Now: She walks over to Mangos, where the owner greets her, to collect her standing order of Jollof Rice, Steamed Vegetables and Groundnut Soup. And on the way back buys her weekly watermelon, which stall-owner David keeps aside for her.
When the movie starts: Various Uber Drivers battle to fit 243.83-Centimeter-Long-Surfboard into various 267.30-Centimeter-Long-Sedans. ( Day#1 )
Now: 243.83-Centimeter-Long-Surfboard has board (and) lodging, at Mr Bright’s Surf Shop, in Kokrobite
When the movie starts: The heroine thinks there are a lot of people in Ghana named “Charlie”. ( See Day#11 )
Now: She starts conversations with “Yoh, Chale man oh..” and can call ‘Obibini’ back when she is called “Oburoni”, without fear of going to jail
When the movie starts: The heroine is frustrated by her colleagues’ loose concept of time-keeping ( See Day#10 )
Now: She factors in an hour (or tow) of GMT time, says her mantra of “people are more important than schedules” and has a Nice Cup Of Tea (or ten) while she waits
When the movie starts: The heroine does not have Vodafone Cash
Now: She has Vodafone Cash. She is not sure why. But she has it. Because that is what Ghanaians do.
When the movie starts: The heroine “dresses for the funeral” every day. ( See Day#28 )
Now: She wears a pair of Adepa “man shorts”
When the movie starts: The heroine does not know her own address ( See Day#27 )
Now: Ok, no. She still does not know her own address