Today is spring-cleaning day. When my colleagues (Pamela and Richard) kitted out my apartment they bought every kind of cleaning aid and room freshener known to mankind. But it does not seem that Handy Andy is big in Ghana. And seeing as my Jumia order still has not arrived, I go off to search the neighbourhood for Handy Andy. Very glamorous, me.
I smiled as I passed Reverend Happy’s supermarket/church (See Day#3), where a very fiery service was underway. And stopped in at Vivian’s shop to see whether she had managed to find me a can opener and clothes hangers (See Day#3). She had!
Most of the shops along the way are closed, everyone is at church. But when I am half-way to the Echohouse offices – thank you, Richard, for driving the same way every day “for me to remember the way” – and about to pass out from sun-stroke (I forgot my hat), I find a Shell. With a shop. And it has aircon! And Jif (Handy Andy’s smaller brother)! And even long-life milk. Which I promptly put back, seeing as I now have an Ideal Milk addiction (See Day#8).
On the way back I decided to take myself back to Mango’s (See Day#2) for my first solo lunch. But I can not find the Kontumeri, Ama ordered for me last time, anywhere on the menu. So I decided to be adventurous and order from my ‘List Of (More) Vegetarian Ghanaian Dishes To Try’. But looking at the menu, which seems to have only meat and something called ‘Point and kill’ (don’t ask), I can not find any of them. I ask the waiter whether there is maybe another menu? There is? Wonderful!
When the other menu arrives it is more meat. But instead of Pork, Chicken and Goat, there are things like ‘Grasscutter’, ‘Towel’, ‘Snail Medium’, ‘Snail Small’, ‘Snail Large’ and “Live Chicken”. Live Chicken?!!
I realise the waiter is still waiting, I order the most vanilla things on the menu: ‘plain rice’, ‘steamed vegetables’ and ‘groundnut soup’.
An hour later, I still do not have my order.
Turns out they had to send someone to find plain rice. Their customers don’t order ‘plain rice’, they order Jollof Rice (made with rice, tomatoes and tomato paste, palm oil, onions, salt, nutmeg, ginger, cumin and HALF A TON of chili.)
HAHAHAHA oh boy you are very very brave
If I was really brave, I would have had something from Menu Two. Hie Hie
It’s the Grasscutter, isn’t it?!!